Cancer Sucks.
Cancer is one of those things that exists. It exists and while we try really hard to fight it, there's no way to completely eradicate it from the world. It sucks.
Our bodies create this horrible horrible disease, albeit there are outside factors that can cause negative mutations of cells in our bodies, but for all we know, it just happens. Sometimes, it happens for no reason. No reason at all. It happens in elderly people, in middle aged people, in young adults, in teens, and what I think is most horrible of all, it happens in children. Children who haven't had a chance to make the stupid choices of smoking, or not wearing sunscreen or putting harmful chemicals in their bodies by choice. I know there are hundreds of things, thousands even, that can increase risk factors, and I know that not every adult or young adult or elderly person who gets cancer makes choices... I know that cancer can happen to everyone whether they make choices or not...
but children. Children are where cancer hits me hard. I've always been very much aware of what cancer can do. I've always been very much aware of how it can hurt families, and people, and when you say the word cancer, a part of me shuts down.
but children. Children don't have a choice. Children haven't lived long enough to understand it. They don't know why cancer happens. In truth, I don't think any of us really know WHY it happens.
I mean, cancer: by definition is the mutation of cells or the uncontrolled division of cells.. Wikipedia says "Cancer is the uncontrolled growth of abnormal cells in the body. Cancerous cells are also called malignant cells."
But why? Why does it happen?
I know a lot of people who say it's because God plans it. God plans cancer. But I don't believe that. I don't think God would choose to throw cancer or diseases at babies, children, or anybody. I think cancer happens because of biology. And God's role in the whole situation, is to help us fight it. He doesn't break laws of science. He helps us fight, He stands by His children, and when our bodies are too spent to fight anymore, He welcomes us to His kingdom.
But WHY. Why does biology do this to people?
No one knows. No one has a clear answer. But I want to know. WHY.
I recently found out that a small child of a family friend has cancer. I'm praying for him. I'm praying for him and his family in every way I know how, and I know that if anyone can handle something like this, it's them... but I'm still angry. In fact, I'm livid. It's not right. It's not fair. I want to know why this happens. I want it laid out in front of me with specific reasons. WHY.
Part of me, part of me is an English Major because there aren't answers. Well... there are, but there isn't just a simple list. Laid out right in front of you with clear definitions and numbers telling you what something means. No, you get to decide. Each perspective, each reader has their own set of feelings that are brought out by the words in front of them. Each person gets to write their own WHY.
But part of me misses science. Part of me misses having it all laid out directly in front of me. With clear and set reasoning and definitions. Part of me wishes everything had answers.
Instead, I'm left here, ranting on a blog about my lack of understanding.
Always Yours,
An UtterlyPissedOffEnglishMajor
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