Finishing

May 17, 2015. 

My goal has always been to finish in 4 years. I would have been happy with 3 1/2-- thanks a lot Berne... but 4 years was the goal. I wanted to finish what I started. I wanted to take those steps across whatever "stage", shake hands with the dean, and flip the tassel. 

Finally, the date is set in stone-- barring any ridiculous and unforeseen crisis. I will graduate from the University of Minnesota with a Bachelors of Arts in English. 

This semester will be the easiest semester I have in college-- as far as course load. I am taking less than 20 credits for the first semester ever. I am in classes that I truly enjoy and look forward to further exploration. 

Mentally, I feel better than I have in years. I feel strong, and confident in my ability to tackle anything that might come. My faith is stronger than ever, and I can honestly say that I trust God to steer me down the path he has chosen for me. 

I used to say how I trusted him (well, and I used to just straight up deny trusting him), but for once... I can feel it. I do trust him. I can feel it because for the first time since college started, my anxiety about the future of my career, what I'm doing post-graduation, is gone. I know that whatever I do, I'll be okay. I know that God's plan, whatever it may be, is the right one... and I know that one way or another, everything will be okay. 

That's... huge for me. Sure, my anxiety about everything else is still pretty much ridiculous and completely out of hand, but the lifting of the pressure to have it all mapped out is gone, and I can just be excited for the day I've been dreaming about... I don't have to think ten steps ahead. It's exciting and beautiful. 

Finishing this chapter of my life is going to be exciting, and fun, and sure, it's still a little scary to think that I'm going to be out of the protective bubble of college, but mostly... I'm just proud to be finishing strong. 

~AnEnglishMajor(ForTheNext5Months)