Cops and Spiders

I got pulled over on the way home from work tonight.

No, I wasn't speeding, texting, or under any sort of influences. My seat belt was fastened and all of the lights on my car were in working fashion.

So you may be asking, Miss English Major, what on EARTH were you doing that got you pulled over then?

You may not be asking, but I'll tell you anyways.

I'm driving home from work, a 7 minute drive, when about half way home dangling from the ceiling of my car, inches from my eyes is a GIANT ASS SPIDER.

Yes.

Giant. Like, the body of the spider was the size of a silver dollar. It was not okay. No part of this experience was okay. So, because I was driving, and literally just leaving a round about, I grabbed the coffee cup (thank you Starbucks) and trapped the sucker against the windshield.

I'm driving down the road, one hand on the steering wheel, the other on the spider-cup. Out of nowhere the spider jumped or fell or something, regardless of what it did, it thumped against my hand on the cup. I jumped. I swerved a little-- STILL IN MY LANE. But, the cop saw and pulled me over.

He walks up to my car window and asks what the hell I was doing (no joke). I explained. He gave me this look like, "this girls is nuts" UNTIL I moved my hand enough so the spider was totally visible. He then helped me to remove the sucker from my car, killed it, and let me go on my way.

The End.

A Grossed Out Arachnophobic English Major.